The Passing and Funeral Services of Irene Moon

After only a few weeks on hospice care, and a few days on morphine to help her stay comfortable, Mom Moon passed in her home surrounded by her children, their spouses and her husband at 6:05 on a Monday evening in July.

Never have I been bedside to witness the death of someone I love. It was humbling, sacred and bittersweet for me. The hands of her children touched and held Mom on a leg, a hand, an arm, a shoulder...as she spent her last breath. She was quiet and calm as she slipped away, supported by her family, through this life to her restful heavenly home. And we cried.

In that moment I looked around the room at her children and husband, and I considered mortality. How miraculous it was that this body before me brought ten children into this world, gave them their bodies and life. And in a reverse of events, they now were surrounding and honoring her and the miracle of her body as she was now finished, ending her life's purpose here with us. Life is short and meaning can be found in family.

We waited a while for the hospice nurse to arrive so she could begin paperwork and declare time of death. She then reached out to the morgue. A husband and wife team, dressed professionally in black, both slight in stature, came into the room and were kind and accommodating. They carefully swaddled Mom in a white sheet and the man easily cradled her in his arms as he carried her down the staircase as watched from above. Her body was laid on a gurney in the entryway and covered from the neck down with a blanket. The two then left the house to wait outside while we said our last goodbyes—to which they said, "Take as much time as you need." After which she was taken out of the house, family following—and lifted into the hearse. They quietly drove away into the night.

We gathered and ate lasagna around 10 p.m. I marveled at the day's events. And our emotions were spent.

The next week Adam and I were with his family. We visited the funeral home where arrangements were made. We went through boxes of photos and memorabilia while sitting in a circle in Larissa's attic. We worked through a few funeral details and ideas at the dinner table. We ate meals together. (Adam's company provided a catered barbecue meal for the family. I was once again reminded of the kindness of his employer and coworkers.) It was a good—but emotionally exhausting time—which I will share a little more of later.

We then left to be with our families to grieve the week before Mom's funeral.  

Mom's obituary can be read by clicking here. Heidi put it together with input from family. And then later at the pulpit explained some of it in detail.

At the church where funeral services were to be held, was a viewing. In the funeral director's words, Mom looked so peaceful and at rest

To accompany the proceedings Heidi, Larissa, Laurel and Shayla put together a table full of selected items in the foyer to build a picture of who Mom was. 

 Travis helped the sisters put a slideshow of photographs together as well. Click here to view on Youtube.

Adam was asked to give the eulogy. He worked on it for hours and days. It's an intensely difficult thing having to summarize your mother's life while also deeply grieving the loss of it. Click here. He's content with how it turned out.

Below is a recording of the service. View on Youtube for better quality. 

After the service we drove to the Dallas Fort Worth National Cemetery where Mom would be interred. This is done at no charge since Dad Moon is a veteran. Due to the high number of service men and women who are laid to rest there, we had a very short time to dedicate the grave—15 minutes. The dedication also did not take place grave-side. The cemetery asked that families handle everything under assigned covered pavilions.

Below is a recording of the pallbearers and Dad Moon thanking everyone and then dedicating the grave. (Dedication starts at minute 3:14) Watch on Youtube for better quality.

After asking Adam to be the last car to leave the cemetery, I rolled the window down and in the Zenk family tradition yelled our own farewell, "Bye Mom! We love you!" 

Later that Day

We enjoyed a luncheon provided by members of Dad Moon's congregation and then ended up at Larissa's house where extended family members played catch-up on old and new gossip.

Above: Irene's Sisters, Rosa, June and Colleen.

Above from left circling clockwise: Dave, Rosa, Colleen, June, Aaron and Dennis.

Above from left circling clockwise: Ned, Mary, Terri, Tom, Heidi, Marsha's daughter and Heather.

Above: Marcia and child, Alisha, Adam, Anna, John and Rosa.

Above: Adam, Rosa and Alisha

Dinner that Night

During lunch I had mentioned how fitting it would be to have dinner at Freddy's, Mom's favorite restaurant, noting that it was probably impractical. But someone must have said something because it happened.

I truly, truly love that we ended the day in a place eating the food that Mom loved. It was the PERFECT thing to do, just like sharing her chocolates. Here's to you Mom!