Monday, January 22, 2024

Reclaimed Time

1. TOOT TOOT

One hundred percent, I am going to toot my own horn right now.

I designed, built and ran a website and its committee for my church (stake). I did it on service hours with volunteer help for two years. And the job I have done was far and above what anyone expected.

A stake is a group of local Church congregations. A stake generally consists of about 3,000 to 5,000 members in five to ten congregations.

When I accepted the volunteer position, the Squarespace site was in its infancy. There was almost NO content. I was told, "You don't have to post anything, just make it look good and make sure the content is appropriate." But it needed more than that. Someone had to put their arms around it and elevate it into a professional, useful, sharable site. And I did!

With the top five being my main responsibilities, by default I had unwittingly become:

Creative Director
Website Administrator
Editor-in-Chief (we publish articles and news etc.)
Graphic Designer
Social Media Manager
Copy Editor and Reporter
(read an article I wrote about the 50 year old modern mid-century building we meet in.)
Marketing Manager
Public Relations (to our membership)
Newsletter Editor
Trainer and educator on Communications practices
Member of the Stake Council
Member of the Stake Communications Council
Videographer (not often)
Video Editor (not often)

Does this seem fair? (It happens a lot to people in the communications world. We are expected to wear multiple hats. Which is unrealistic, I might add.)

2. CHALLENGES AND COMPLEXITY

The site is currently unparalleled by any other stake site in the world (that I know of) in its complexity and scope. What I was able to accomplish blew my leadership away. This is not an overstatement.

Furthermore, a stake website is a rarity—most don't have one. Ours has caught the attention of other stakes who began seeking my advice on how to start a website of their own.

Below: I mean, have you ever seen such a beautiful "Resource" page? On the live site it translates well to your mobile too. Toot toot!

What I didn't anticipate:

Leadership (my "bosses") would continue to misunderstand the amount of hours and skill required to keep a professional site functioning and growing.

And to my absolute SHOCK, two people were re-assigned elsewhere. I couldn't afford to lose either one of them so it was completely deflating. But this action was very telling about the level of understanding.
Adding to the committee would be nearly impossible.

Finding SKILLED help who: are available to take a volunteer position on the committee, have follow-through (no task is simple which comes as a shock to many), and who have the time necessary—is nearly impossible.

The more people I added to the committee, the more work it was for me. You can't expect a volunteer committee without the right skills, to function at a professional level at a quick/timely pace. Something will have to give. I don’t mean to sound brutal or unappreciative, (I feel quite the opposite and have enjoyed and appreciate the people I worked with) but I AM being realistic.

3. SIMPLIFICATION

Two years passed as I tried different ways to reduce my 30 hour work weeks. With all my discretionary time gone, I was unable to enjoy any personal side projects that "fill my bucket," it made my home and personal life increasingly difficult to enjoy.

I recognize that it's not okay for anyone to give that many service hours (in this capacity) and I burnt out before I could solve the problem. So, I had a meeting with a member of the stake presidency. During our conversation he seemed to understand the issues at hand. I gave him suggestions on ways the site could be simplified to a more manageable level. But I also told him I needed to be finished with the position (it was with the greatest disappointment on my part. I could have done this for years under the right parameters. It was suited for me quite well.)

4. RELEASED

When I attended the "handover” meeting two weeks ago, I learned THREE new people have been asked to fill my position. And to my bewilderment, leadership had decided to make NO CHANGES toward simplification. NO CHANGES!?!?

I had been feeling ashamed of myself for not staying to implement the solutions I had suggested. But when I discovered they had thrown more people at the problem instead of simplifying—I left the meeting feeling completely free and released of all guilt!

Now, let it be said, running a website like this is a FULL TIME job in the professional arena, so more people on the committee should work to spread out the load (I spent two years trying to do this after all) and it's the only solution that I could see to maintaining its path. However, when the skill pool and available service hours are both incredibly small, what happens when key players burn out?

5. BETWEEN US

Between you and me, I am interested to see what happens to the website. Those who have replaced me are web developers. And as we all know, graphic designers and web developers butt heads. So we’ll see what design changes they make. (It has already begun. LOL.)

Also, I secretly hope the stake offers me a toned down service position on the committee before my own congregation snatches me back up into something ho-hum. (All members of our faith serve in the church in some capacity. It is a 100% volunteer organization. We serve where we are needed and not necessarily where we want to.) I would enjoy being the Graphic Designer for the Stake Communications Committee. But alas, I doubt I will get that lucky...too many other people like "playing designer."

5. RECLAMATION

A friend asked, what I am doing with all my time? I am:

catching up on TWO years of photos (aka: blogging)
working on house renovations which desperately need my time
making products with my sister for a low-key online shop
sleeping (now that the unsolvable problem doesn't keep me awake in the wee hours, or text me in the early morning asking for something)

I'm stinking EXCITED to have reclaimed such a large chunk of my day and nights. And Adam is happy to have reclaimed ME.

Sunday, January 21, 2024

Christmas Activities

This year every person in the family thought of an activity for the Christmas break. The parameters outlined were: it didn't matter how long or short the activity would be or where it was to take place. I believe it was a success!

We:
—played Jenkins Up
—flipped cups
—participated in the Reindeer Games
—fashioned earrings
—cut paper bags for snowflakes (addicting)
—dipped candles
—launched rockets
—puzzle solved with matches
—enjoyed a quilt show
—swat at the annual dance party
—lit "fireworks" and went for creative walks

I hope we do this again. I enjoy activities because they are inherent memory makers and a reason to gather, get reacquainted after time apart, and enjoy the company of those dear to our heart instead of sitting around staring at our mini screens. I'll always remember this Christmas because of the activities we planned participated in. (And as I work on images and video...my heart is full. I love my family.)

Click here to watch on YouTube for better quality. There's no music, but there is sound.

Saturday, January 20, 2024

The Great Cleanup

Because this is a major part of our family history we're now sharing that my mother-in-law, Irene, who recently passed away, was a hoarder. Adam also has an adult sister, Heather who is autistic and lives at home, she too hoards because she doesn't know any better.

Months before her passing in July 2023, when Irene had already begun her mental and physical decline, it became apparent the two story home had to be cleaned out for safety and care she would soon need. Consequently, Adam's Dad, Dennis retired immediately. And funds had to be freed that were paying for seven storage units that were housing more of Irene's collections. And also by then, Heather had hoarded herself out of both beds in two of the rooms available to her. She was sleeping in a small space on the floor.

I'm sharing this because through a level of understanding and love—it's OKAY. We took care of the impossible (Adam's siblings deserve most of the credit) THIS work is behind us. Whatever troubled Mom and led to her hoarding and inability to seek change...is now being healed on the other side. The family is doing their best to help Heather understand how to live a better life. And Dennis is looking forward to a fresh start in a soon-to-be renovated home with an attached apartment for Heather.

This post isn't meant to shame or shock anyone. It is simply to record the crazy reality of a family who has to deal with the physical situation of a massive hoard. It is what it is. (It is emotional too...but this is not the place to talk about it.)

The family held TWO FULLY stocked estate sales at Larissa's home, a week apart. The first sale was everything from the storage units. The second was everything from the house. (All items were packed and hauled across town for the sale. Everyone worked from morning until late nights throughout the two/three weeks. It was an impossible amount of work, we each found our limitations, and injuries were sustained from the sheer repetitive volume of heavy lifting.)

I wish there was a way to have monetized some of Irene's collection—but how do you with the collection the size of SEVEN storage units and a full house? No one could have spared the amount of time needed to help Irene start a business, she wasn't tech savvy enough run it herself, and then there would have been the related expenses. I think she probably felt utterly stuck as did we, and as most hoarders she was ultimately unable to share, rent, give away, or sell any amount that would have put a dent in the problem. I can only imagine how she must have felt.

When it came to it, the ONLY options were to pay someone to haul everything away (which also turned out to be complicated) walk away and pay a fee (didn't solve the house problem though) or try to sell as much as possible to help Dennis with expenses.

It was decided to sell.

There was a ton of glass in one of the units. Beautiful pieces I had never seen before (above). Milk glass was going for $1 per piece! Buyers felt bad paying so little, but it had to go. Other's got an even better deal for bulk purchasing.

The glass was so heavy, the truck was over its weight limit each trip.

Watch the video in YouTube for better quality.

(I would have loved one of these jars to put my lemon tree in. But they are worth A LOT.)

I pulled so much Tupperware out of the house...there was no way to display it except to lay it out along the front of the property. It became what Heidi called, "The Great Tupperware Reef."

Below are boxes of snack sets. (This isn't all of them.) I was offered some, and now I have a collection for full service! Thank you Irene!

You can't tell how much of something there actually is...

...until you get it organized.

Many people asked how Irene was doing with the clean up. Thankfully, by then she wasn't fully herself. She was mostly unable to process what was going on. But she did still have some fun and tried on her high school cheerleader outfit for us.

We are ALL thankful for this tender mercy. Had she comprehended the finality of stuff leaving her house, the job would have been far more emotional and difficult than it already was. And there were other trials, such as managing Heather and the city pouring a new concrete road right in front of the house. Seriously!?!

Irene often asked to be with us for a short time as we were working or eating as seen below. (Left to right: Heidi, Laurel, and Irene) She would just watch and make comments from time to time and was very pleasant.

Below are a few images of the house before it was cleaned out. This is the room Heather was sleeping in.

Below was the view from the kitchen into a formal dining room.

Below was the kitchen.

Below was the view standing in the same spot as above, looking the other way into the informal dining and family room.

Below is an after image. We sat as a family and supped together for the first time in this house since Adam and I have lived here. I cried. It was wonderful and I know it meant a lot to Dennis and everyone else.